This is my first fanfic that I've ever wrote. Sorry in advance. I'll probably continue this and hopefully make it a bit better.
The last bit of sunlight creeps into the room from the windows. St. Dymphna’s is completely silent at this time, save for the scribbling sounds of ink on paper. I remember when I thought this was extremely erie. Now it's practically an everyday occurrence. It’s pretty annoying, but someone has to do it. At the very least, I get thanks from the other members of the council. That’s what really counts in the end. I do what’s expected of me and receive appreciation. It’s all I can ask for really.
Well, that and something to eat. My rumbling stomach is now filling the silent room, overtaking the sound of my pen. Not to mention, I can feel a headache forming. At this moment, I could really use Katja’s food.
It’s not too long before my wish is granted as she bursts into the room holding a paper bag that seems filled to the very top. The sunlight has gotten dimmer, but I can still see Katja’s radiance clearly. Her strawberry blond hair glows with brilliance, further enhanced by what little sunlight there is left. Her skin is that of a Goddess, nearly flawless in everyway. Even her eyepatch doesn’t take away from the beauty of her face. I could look deeply into her sole eye for hours. Not to mention her body, which is…
Ah, I’m going off again. It would be safe to say I have a small crush on her. Though, honestly, who can blame me? Objectively, she is extremely attractive. Not to mention, she has a very nice personality. So, it is perfectly understandable that I would admire her in such a way.
Shaking those thoughts out of my mind, I get up from my seat and head over towards her with a smile on my face. “Hey Katja,” I say with a soft tone. Before I know it, my arms are already wrapped around her in a hug.
A surprised “Oh!” pops out of her. After a brief pause, she returns the embrace without dispute, even sporting a grin along with it. She giggles a bit before speaking. “Well well, someone is happy to see me.”
Her words cause a flush of red to appear on my face. “Well,” I sigh. “I’m just happy you finally brought some food. I, uh, skipped lunch to come get some of the easier paperwork done.”
The smile on her face falls down to a frown. “Now, Ela,” she begins to scold. “The student council president of all people should be the type to skip out on lunch. It’s quite bad for a role model such as yourself to do. Not to mention how horrible it is for your poor stomach.”
Her tone is rather serious, but I can’t help but smile at her. Even if my head is hung down slightly. Most of her words are those I’ve heard before, and they’re ignored in favor of admiring Katja’s beauty a bit more.
“Yes, yes, I know.” I reply with what I usually say. “There was just a lot of work, and I didn’t really want to stay so late this time. But it doesn’t seem like that’ll matter given how much there still is.”
The large stack of paper on the desk creates a pit in my stomach. Even though I know it’s not that large, it’s still makes me anxious. However, as I look over to Katja’s lovely smile, all of my fear melts away. “Don’t worry,” she says in a comforting tone that only she can pull off. “It’ll take less time than you imagine. But first, you should eat.”
She lays down the brown paper bag on the table, taking out a few contents wrapped in plastic. From what I can tell it’s some slices of bread. Baguette, I think. She knows me so well! I feel all my worries flow out of me as I sit back down, unwrapping the delicious food made with what I can only assume is love. The inside of the slice has a nice golden hue to it, while the crust is a perfect brown. It’s still a little hot, and the buttery aroma coming from it is nothing short of amazing.
I’m broken out of my admiration by the soft sound of a giggle. It seems that Katja has taken the seat right next to me. As I turn towards her, face red as a strawberry, she flashes me another one of her gorgeous smiles and gestures towards the food.
She doesn't need to tell me any more than that. I take a bite out of the baguette piece, causing a rather loud crunch sound. The buttery taste coupled with the texture of it is perfection. It's crunchy at first, but the original softness of the bread comes through. It's warm, but not enough to burn my mouth. As expected, Katja makes some really good bread.
After swallowing the food, I turn over towards her. “This is amazing!” I exclaim. “This is probably one of the best pieces of bread I've tasted, no lie. Though, I shouldn't have expected any less from you.”
The compliment comes out of me without thinking, and as I see Katja’s flustered face, regret starts to flow through me. “How, uh, kind of you to say,” she replies, obviously embarrassed to some degree. “Though to be frank, I’m not as good of a baker as you are to believed. I simply bought the bread and transformed it into what you’re eating at the moment.”
“Well, then you must make everything you touch perfect, because this bread is really good.”
Another comment that seems to fluster her. Odd. Normally she’s not like this. Whatever praise I give her goes in one ear and out the other. From my perspective at least. Maybe I’m just not keen enough to pick up on her reactions, though. Although that’s unlikely, seeing as I’m admiring her every chance I can get.
I shake the thoughts out of my heads and go back to eating the bread slices. Katja, seemingly holding an appetite herself, starts to eat as well. As I enjoy the carb filled greatness, I can’t help but look over at her. She truly is perfection. Even her form as she eats is elegant. The way she holds herself in general in elegant. Her posture, the way she walks, and the way she talks. Not to mention her body, which is the definition of attractive. She’s got nice hips, a nice waist, and certainly a nice bust, as lewd as thinking about it is.
I getting lost in the thought of her again, even after she stares back at me with a look that seems to be a mixture of worry and embarrassment. Or, maybe that’s just my own embarrassment clouding my vision. Or maybe something worse. I can slightly make out her asking if I was okay, with my only response being to jolt my head downward and stare at the ground, eating the bread in my hand quicker and quicker.
“Ela,” I can hear her call out from my left ear. “Are you alright, dear?”
She called me dear. That came out of nowhere. Why would she call me that? Maybe she just calls everyone that, who knows, but all it does it fuel my embarrassment even more. It feels familiar. Similar to anxiousness. I know it isn’t. At least my brain does. However, my body apparently doesn’t, as the dreadful pit in my stomach opens its gaping mouth. Deep breaths, Ela. Deep breaths. Nothing bad is happening. Deep breaths, deep breaths.
Then I feel a tightness around me. Not too tight, in fact it doesn’t feel threatening at all. It feels warm, and soft. Katja starts to stroke the strands of my hair, probably trying to calm me down. However, this just causes my embarrassment to go through the roof. Luckily the gaping hole shut itself, and I’m left sitting here flustered in Katja’s arms.We sit like this for what seems like hours, though it was probably only a few minutes. I look up at her, noticing that her eye looks as if she’s seen something quite disturbing.
“S-sorry.” I say, as it’s the only word I can properly get out while in this position.
“No, no, don’t apologize, Ela.” She sighs out of relief. “Are you alright then?”
“Yeah, I’m good now,” I reply, picking myself back up to a sitting position as she lets go of her embrace. I’m left looking at straight at her. At her beautiful eye that no longer looks so disturbed. It has a different emotion, one that I can’t exactly pinpoint with my state of mind. Concern, possibly, but it seems more than that alone.
I’m staring at her again. It’s a habit only when it comes to Katja, it seems. Though, this time, she doesn’t seem to mind it that much at the moment. Understandable, given what just transpired.
“Ela,” she whispers. “What is on your mind, dear? I’m not going to judge you for it, I promise. Just tell me what’s wrong so I can help.”
I tilt my head down. This is not the place I want to be in right now. In fact, it’s probably the worst scenario to be in, other than the panic attack. I run through some sentences I can say as to not creep her out. Eventually I find something that works. Then, without any warning, I look her dead in the eye and just blurt it out.
“I think you're very attractive in every single way!”
Each second that passes after that, her face seems to get redder and redder. Her mouth is practically agape. Her eye reads confusion and embarrassment. She takes a moment to breath, and the flushed cheeks go back to her pristine skin color.
Taking a moment to clear her throat, she finally speaks. “Well, that is quite the compliment to give someone, Ela. I appreciate it heavily. However, I must ask, are you saying this platonically, or do you personally find me attractive?”
“Personally,” I blurt. That was out of instinct, and I regret it as soon as it leaves my mouth. A sigh escapes my mouth, and tilt my head down.
“I see.” She says, nodding while doing so. Her cheeks start to get red again. “To tell you the truth, this is the first time a girl has ever confessed to liking me in any other way than platonically. Though, I’m sure that there have been a few admirers. Just none that would admit it.
She sighs, pausing a moment before speaking again. “You see, this is rather awkward for me. If I were to be perfectly honest with myself, I am not opposed to dating other women. However, I can’t help but be on the fence about it, so to speak.”
This is just a nice way of rejecting me. Honestly, I understand what she’s saying. She’s curious at most, and nothing more. Not yet at least. Not until she sates her curiosity. Which gives me an idea. One that turns my face red once again.
“But, “ I start, finding it hard to form the words I require. “You’re… Curious, right?”
She briefly nods. “I suppose that would be the correct description, yes.”
“Then, you can’t exactly rule it out until you, well, try it, right?”
Katja looks down, sighing as she does so. “I understand what you’re trying to get at,” she states, eye focused back onto me with intensity. “The problem is that I do not want to get your hopes up for something that might not ever be possible.
I open my mouth, but I’m cut off before I can get anything out. “That being said… Trying with anyone else would probably end up hurting you more in the long run. Am I correct for assuming that?”
It takes me a while to think it over. No doubt it would hurt. However, would it hurt as much as rejection? Well, yes, it would. I’ve been rejected before. It hurt. A lot. I’ve even been cheated on before. That hurt more. I tried my hardest to be their everything for them, just like I do for everyone else, and yet I get thrown into the trash. I don’t think I can take that happening again.
“You’re correct.” I reply, a sad smile on my face.
With an accepting nod, she takes this defeat. “Okay. We shall try then. Nothing above kiss, though, please. Even my curiousity has limits.”
My smile turns genuine as I jolt up from my seat. Maybe from surprise, or happiness. I can’t tell, as a million words flow in and out of my brain. Katja’s face is that of a person getting at tattoo, only they’re afraid of needles. It’s adorable, and it’s all I need to walk up and touch my own lips with her’s.
My eyes are closed, but the image of Katja’s shocked face still lingers. It’s like my lips are kissing a cloud. The feeling of it flows through the river of nerves in my body. The water reaching everywhere. Seconds turns to minutes. Minutes turn to hours. Hours turn to day. Even if days turned to years, I wouldn’t separate from her lips. However, my own pleasure isn’t what’s important at the moment, so after only a few seconds, which thankfully feels a lot longer than that, my lips move away from Katja’s. Hers noticeably follows mine a bit before receding back.
It doesn’t take me long to notice the emotion of Katja’s face. Her delicate fingers rub her own lips for a second. Her single eye is staring right down at the floor. The lips that I kissed are opened slightly.
She jolts up, looking directly at me this time. Without warning, she walks over and pulls me into another kiss. Needless to say, I’m taken by surprise. After one simple kiss, it seems odd that she’d be so forward. I’m not complaining, however, as the stimulation from the first kiss is more than doubled as her body is pressed against mine. Not only am I kissing the cloud, but now I’m being hugged by it aswell.
It lasts only a second or two longer. Katja is the first to pull away, though her arms are still wrapped around me. Her look is the same as the first time. “What?” I ask. “Are you gonna kiss me again?”
Her response is a frown. “Not today,” She replies, sadly letting go of her hold on me. “I’ll need some time to let the experience sink in before I make any rash decisions. However, I must say… That it was quite pleasant.”
My eyes widen and a childish grin appears on my face. While it’s not exactly what I wanted to hear, it’s still a good thing. Better than outright rejection, anyway.
“Now then,” She says. “Why don’t we continue the meal?”
Oh crap. I grab a piece of bread and confirm that the heat has completely disappeared. I let out a sigh, only to take bite of the piece.